missing.

before long

I’ll be gone

in a trail of dust

engine noise

and exhaust fumes

is how

you’ll remember me

I’m sorry

I’m missing.

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perfectly broken.

there are 2 types of people, “perfect” people and “broken” people. I know I know I know! no one is perfect but hear me out. the debate here is which one is better… I say the broken people and here is why. the “perfect” person is the person that has lived there life to this point without taking any big risks without experiencing any real tragedy. I am not talking about break ups or broken heartedness I am talking about real tragedy. the “broken” people are the people that have truly experienced the evil in the world, the tragedy and the comedy in all of it. those people have dragged themselves up from the rubble, the absolute zero, the very bottom of everything, and in turn it has taught them to become more open minded, stronger, patient, empathetic, and wise beings.

12 minutes.

heaven, what to say, what to say. heaven stems from having a blind faith in something completely and utterly unseen. the belief is something larger than you and I, a higher power if you will. certain types of people among us need this belief or organized religion to find comfort and acceptance in the fact that one day we will all reach our demise. then you have me, I am guilty of mixing something as cold, hard, and undeniable factual and believable as science with something as mysterious and unknown as spirituality. so I ask you now, what is your heaven?

heaven in the Christian faith is the afterlife for the forgiven sinners and believers. walk through the pearly gates on your judgement day. heaven in other religious belief systems is the “waiting room” before reincarnation, the idea that souls are reborn time and again in different forms until what that soul was meant to do is complete. some people don’t believe in Heaven at all.

now for my theory on what heaven is. scientists say that for 12 minutes after you’re dead, when you heart no longer beats, when the blood no longer flows, when external stimulus is no longer being processed and analyzed, your brain still functions. in that 12 minutes of pure subconscious thought and activity, whatever it is in there, whoever you are with, whatever you are doing, wherever you may be, that is your heaven. if you think further into it a dream, which is purely subconscious brain activity, takes a millisecond to flash into your mind but it plays out an entire 8 hour scenario. so now I want you to imagine what 12 minutes of that would feel like. it would be an eternity.